Well, I think OoS thru actual cheating is extremely rare.
It usually happens when u do something mega like EQ or MS or something CPU intensive.
I always thikn that's why it looks like it happens when u are winning cos the guy who is winning is usually the one who pulls off something like that.
And if one of your opponents (or ally) has a lesser spec machine/connection, and it grinds to a halt, the data flow between PCs goes BWWAAWARGRGGHHH, and decides it goes out of sync.
U can see why tho.
When AoE or AoK came out, most of us had 56k, and your PC spec varied bewtween a pentium 100mhz and a p2 200 mghz or whatever.
But now u got anything between a T3 to 56k and anything from a P2 400 to a p4 2.8 Ghz and a whole HOST of graphics cards... and is it AMD or Intel.. what OS is it... bla bla bla... routers/firewalls..
Doesn't happen too often tho unless more than one of u are playing on the same LAN... if so, put that hostport startup parameter in and it will sort it.